I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Randomize
