Are we in a gay sports bar?
Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize
