Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Randomize