I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
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