you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
I want to be your penis for a week.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
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