I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
Randomize
