Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
