end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
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