once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
And the cops told us we were all naked.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
Randomize
