last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Randomize
