let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
Randomize
