I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
