i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
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