so that wasnt chicken after all
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
Randomize
