ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Randomize
