Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
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