White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
Randomize