i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
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