Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
