weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
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