everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize
