toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Randomize
