just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
