i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
Randomize
