hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
Randomize
