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i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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