508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
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