Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize