we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
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