I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Randomize
