porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
Randomize