I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Randomize
