theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
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