i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
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