Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
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