going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
Randomize
