it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
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