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I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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