how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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