We should be called the Road Head Warriors
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Randomize
