How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
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