Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
