I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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