Have you finally orgasmed yet?
grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Randomize
