Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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