Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
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