Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
Randomize
