Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
I didn't notice because vodka
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
Randomize
