I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
Randomize
