please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
I am midnight drunk by noon
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Your christmas gifts are already wrapped, how on top of my shit am I?
I'm hungover as fuck and had to break into my own house by throwing a cinder block through my back door at 4am. You're more on top of your shit than me.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
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